My Breastfeeding Confession

My twins are nearly 2 yrs of age, and I’m still breastfeeding them. Judge as you will….I did it for them not you!

Before the birth of my first born child, I was determined to breastfeed. I’m not going to even bore you with the details of just how bad both sides of the family have had it with allergies, asthma and eczema, but IT.IS. BAD! For those reasons alone, short and long term health of my children, I was determined to be successful with breastfeeding.

Unfortunately, before and shortly after the birth of my first born child, I had an ongoing judgment whispered to me from women in my life either in passing and some acquaintances; the idea of breastfeeding until the age of two was “disgusting”, “horrible”, and “weird.”

Sadly, this pressured me to wean my first born child at the age of 18 months, though he was crying for me to still breastfeed him. The weaning process was a horrible experience, and I’ve always regretted stopping when he wasn’t ready. I wish I had weaned him slower but as the age of 2 was approaching and he was breastfeeding up to four times a day, I felt pressured to just stop.

It started again with my twins, as they approached the age of 18 months, like déjà vu, all over again, I felt the pressure to stop breastfeeding. There have been times where I have been in the breastfeeding area at Nordstrom’s and gotten the surprised looks of moms breastfeeding newborns and a few questions such as “how old are the twins” followed by a “Huh” and frown, or when some of my own friends made statements that they looked so big and funny in my arms and still breastfeeding, down to just the looks I get from others when I tell them that I’m still breastfeeding. Ok, yes, it doesn’t help that there are two and that can look awkward and different for breastfeeding comparatively to one, so I know some looks are just from that. Still, the looks and words of judgment spoken are the same to when I was breastfeeding my one child years ago….too old to breastfeed?

On the flip side, I’ve also received support from many others for breastfeeding as long as I have. For that, I’m grateful. The comments such as “that’s great”, “wish I still was but I just dried up”, or “wow that is awesome and with twins” have helped me outweigh the negative comments.

In the end, this time around, I’ve thankfully matured enough to say, we will stop breastfeeding when it is best for us to stop and not when the judgmental world around us tells us we should stop. Thankfully, having children has made me wiser and probably the greatest lesson I’ve learned is to do what is best for my children and ignore the judgment of others.

I was inspired to write this post following the encouragement of my Scottish friend, Kat, who posted herself breastfeeding today at Dundee, Scotland train station supporting National Breastfeeding Week #breast4mybaby.

Thanks to all the friends and moms out there who have supported breastfeeding! I hope my post can bring encouragement to other moms who might be feeling judged or unsure of breastfeeding whether first time, long term, twins or just in breastfeeding. No matter what the situation, breastfeeding is not as easy as most people think it is and those who want to breastfeed need all the encouragement they can get. Support World Breastfeeding Week, 1-7 August 2014 by supporting other moms wanting to or currently breastfeeding.

My twins are nearly two years of age and #IAmStillBreastfeeding Judge as you will, there is my breastfeeding confession!

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19 thoughts on “My Breastfeeding Confession”

  1. Great post! I just posted a “hot topic” debate about this very subject on my blog last week. My son just turned 1 today (!) and it’s crazy to me how all of a sudden people think it’s time to stop breastfeeding. I’m just going with the flow and following his lead! That’s awesome that you are still nursing your twins!

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  2. So great! I love this. I agree–it’s nice when you finally realize that it just doesn’t matter what others say & think. We just do what is best for our families, even if that makes us the lone crazy in the room. 🙂 Thank you for sharing this with me!

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  3. I am just so impressed by all that you do! AND with a smile on your face! I read this post after I just read another one about the Pope’s 10 Steps to Happiness. They include 3 that seem to apply here: Live and let live, Stop being negative, and Respect others’ beliefs.

    I’m glad that you wrote this, as I’m sure there are lots of moms out there that either need the validation that what they’re doing is okay, or others that need to be more aware of the effect from comments they make. You go girl!!

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    • Ahhh Kim what sweet words of love and support for my post. Thank you so much! Your support and feedback mean more to me than you know!

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  4. You are a wonderful mom and everything you wrote hit home. Your oldest son and mine are the same age, and I have not had another child, but I continue to go to baby showers of friends and there is never a shortage of advice and questions and comments along those lines.
    My own mother is an IBCLC (International Board Certified Lactation Consultant) and I breastfed my son until he was 22 months and ready to stop.
    So many moms look at me or ask or respond with a guilty “I tried my best and we got 6 weeks in and that was enough”. I do not judge them for stopping, although I assume that they think I do.
    Everyone has an opinion of the “right” way or the “best” way to raise a child, but when it comes to knowing your body and your baby and your life circumstances, the only expert on what is best for your child is you!
    People judge and speculate on my choice to co-sleep but I have yet to hear a story or read an article about a teenage boy refusing to go off to college because he was still sleeping in his mommy’s bed, so I am not worried about it.
    “There is more than one way to get to 4.” (2+2=4; 1-5=4; 3+1=4; 8/2=4, etc.)

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    • Whitney, What lovely words of truth in so many aspects! I agree with your feedback. Listening to others is great for ideas and support, and in the end, every mother should listen to her own heart to make the best decision for their own.

      I wrote a post about co-sleeping on this blog and got a lot of backlash, so I followed up that post with a list of how to co-sleep responsibly. Still supporting co-sleeping!
      It’s crazy to me that in other cultures they judge Americans for putting their babies in a separate room while Americans judge those who co-sleep…different cultures, different ideas…Like you, I keep an open mind and try to do what is best for my child, for me, for my family.

      Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts, your compliment, and your support. It really means a lot to me, and it sounds like you are making wise and loving decisions for your son.

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  5. Nothing worse than someone who thinks they have a right to tell you how to be a parent. Continue being a great Mom! 🙂
    Thank you for linking up to the Bloggers Brags Pinterest Party. I have pinned your post to the Bloggers Brags Pinterest board.

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    • Thanks Carie, for your feedback, support and compliment! So true, it’s hard to hear others tell you how to parent…Moms need more support and less judgement, in all aspects!

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  6. Good for you! The only one I thought was weird out in public was a mom who was at a table with a mixed group–mostly men and her maybe 3 year old. I think it was a Christian publishing conference or something. Anyway the child kept getting in and out of her shirt. It obviously didn’t need the milk as it could eat table food and nursing just gave him something to do. It would have been okay if he just nursed once and was done, but he kept going under and then coming out. Needless to say, it was a little awkward! I only nursed until 1 and all my kids seemed to not mind ending. I was going to nurse my last longer, but I got mastitis 3 times, and finally quit at 11 months. Your post was the most clicked post last week on the Bloggers Brags Party and will be featured this next week!

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    • Thanks Tammy!
      Your story shared made me laugh. I do know what you are talking about and have seen similar situations in public. I personally, was always more discreet with breastfeeding. Especially with the twins, because basically you can’t cover up enough!!!
      For me, it was more for health benefits than bonding or a soothing aspect for my children. That’s great that you were able to breastfeed and for so long. I can only imagine how painful the mastitis were, but 11 months is a long time!I’m super excited to hear the good news of being featured again. VERY excited and honored! Thank you!

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  7. Good for you momma! My 17 month old is still going strong, I’m not sure how long he will nurse. His older brother nursed until 22 months, we did momma and baby led weaning. I started it a little around eighteen months and then he just kept certain times going until one day he was done. No more nummies. It was probably because he wasn’t getting anything as I was pregnant at that point.
    Stay strong! You will know when it is time, either you will be ready or they will. 🙂

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    • Rebekah, I love your feedback for several reasons. First of all, thank, you! Secondly, I was just thinking to myself, last week, how will I stop….I think it will go on and stop as you described just momma and baby led weaning. Thanks for the encouragement. I really appreciate the words of support, shared experience and connection.

      Reply

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