When does Life Get Easier with Twins?

For the first 1 ½ years, I kept wondering when it would get easier with my twins. Actually, I think all moms, and dads, but especially first time parents are surprised with just how sleep-deprived they become, attention-demanding a newborn is, and are surprised at the extent of suddenly evaporated free time. How daunting the situation is when handling a new human in your life varies depending on several factors such as your lifestyle, having help (your “village”), other siblings, health of babies, how they are sleeping, how they are eating, how many newborns you have, et cetera.

For me personally, 14 months is when I felt things were getting easier. By “things” I mean life in managing being able to get out of the house with my boys and actually achieve meetups and massive errand running. My twins had stopped one of their night time breast-feedings so I got a little more sleep, and they were past the stage of learning to walk and getting into absolutely everything(though this changed drastically at 2 1/2 years of age). Starting at 14 months, I didn’t have to carry my twins as much to keep up with them as they were better at staying closer to me and not being quite as rangy. Before that, as soon as their little feet would hit the ground they would totally disperse.

I was able to get out and do more with the three boys, I have an older singleton, from playgrounds to running errands. Up until 14 months of age, it was hard to safely go to playgrounds, meetups, playdates, or events with only me watching. It still isn’t easy, but at least more manageable and doable at more places. I know some moms of multiples have said 3 months or 6 months or 1 year but usually the common factor in stating the easier passage is the ability to get out of the house for an outing with twins in tote. With my twins born prematurely and during respiratory syncytial virus (RSV) season, I was advised to not leave the house and limit social visits until the end of RSV season. That put my twins at nearly 7 months of age. It was a very difficult house arrest for my family.

So with being able to get out of the house more, and safely, where I could manage all three of my boys; then I felt “things” were easier. My husband disagrees with me and feels they only have gotten more difficult with time. I think it is just because he has had less practice with taking them out and learning how to manage them, not having the fear of losing one plus all the energy it takes him to keep up with the boys. My twins started walking at the age of 10 and 11 months. So depending on when your twins start walking is also a wildcard factor with answering this question, “when will it get easier.”

From what other moms of multiples have told me, and how I personally have felt, when you can manage outings WITH your twins, THAT is when it gets easier.
Spoiler alert: Enjoy the easy moments because then life and managing kids and life will get hard again, then harder, then it might get easy for a while again and then hard then easy….so is the life with children.

There are two things in life for which we are never truly prepared: twins. ~Josh Billings

When did life get easier for you with twins, triplets or a singleton? Tuesdays I try to post about Multiples for TwinZone Tuesdays. Are you a mom of multiples? Are you in the TwinZone? We would love to connect and hear from you!

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12 thoughts on “When does Life Get Easier with Twins?”

  1. Life with my twins loosened up at 12 months for sure (solid food) and continues to get easier with every new independence skill they master. My girls are 2 and for the most part, its a golden season! Phew!

    • Absolutely agree Rachel, every independent step helps a little…sometimes. When my boys can independently start driving, I think I will completely turn gray haired!

  2. We have 2 1/2 year old twin boys and I can’t tell you when things got easier for us because, seriously, they’ve been 2 for like 10 years! This is the LONGEST year of my life! We also have an older singleton and we thought her 2’s were bad. NO WAY! Her 2’s will never compare to the amount of poop I’ve cleaned up off my walls and furniture, the baby proofing we’ve done to like the 10th power, the biting stage that last a full YEAR (and we still struggle with), I could seriously go on and on and on. The only thing I hold on to is that 3 years old is 4 months away and maybe, just maybe, I can finally say things have gotten easier =)

    • Haha Jennifer, I’m dying with your response though I know it’s not funny to you!! I also do feel your struggle friend.Just imagining those two at two giving you such grief especially with the poop on the walls….as mine closed in on three things got better/easier. I know it will get hard again but for now I’m coasting easier. Hang in there and I hope your easier season comes sooner than later!

  3. Mine are now 18 months and it has just gotten different. When they were babies I found it very easy to go out with them and my older one. While I do get ‘more’ sleep now, the still wake up multiple times a night. And going out is harder since they walk and run. But regardless of how hard it is and how much I never thought I wanted twins, I could not imagine my life not being a twin mom anymore.

  4. My twins turn 1 in two weeks and they are my first. In some ways it has gotten easier. They eat more independently, drink less bottles, and the number of diapers per day has gone down and I can definitely go places by myself with them thanks to baby wearing, even though my husband thinks they are harder than ever. I agree with the idea that he has less practice. In other ways.it has gotten harder. They started walking at 10 months and have been getting into everything, luckily my house is small so they don’t have much room to get lost or hide but oh how they love cabinets. They have become very curious and independent, and while they can be a handful I can’t imagine it being any other way.

    • Frances, totally agee…I remember that stage of my twins starting to walk and getting into more so things got harder but then easier with other things changing.No matter what season, easy or hard, I also could not imagine it being any other way!!

  5. I have two sets. My first set was easy from the start. They were perfect – slept through the night at 4 months, tandem breastfed for over a year, never sick. My second set: opposite. They both were hospitalized with RSV at 9 months, they were terrible nursers, one had reflux, both had lactose intolerance, one had dairy sensitivity, they didn’t sleep through the night at all until 18 months (and still don’t always). So with them it wasn’t until about 2 1/2 that it got easy – when they were potty trained, could dress themselves, could communicate their needs.

    • Oh Lisa, that is so hard that they got RSV….can’t even imagine. Mine also had reflux issues that made things messy, gross, hard….too bad you had it so hard the second time around instead of the first. Especially since you had older twins to still care for. That’s crazy for me to imagine two sets of twins. At one point, I would have thought this a nightmare now with mine nearing three, I’d love to have another set!!!

  6. I’m still waiting after 16 yrs. The best break I’ve gotten has been a youth organization called Young Life and the kids get out of my hair two nights a week and then off to camp in the fall and summer. But it has never slowed down, juggling school, work, clubs, coaches, doctors, grandparents and friends….I barely ever get to see my friends…my career…was over the day I got pregnant and have lost too many friends to mention. Oh well, still wouldn’t trade them for anything.

    • I’m familiar with young life. My brother and I were involved in this organization in our youth….really great! It is hard trying to juggle it all and find a balance. Daily, weekly, monthly, lifetime struggle. Thanks for sharing, and reading Leslie!

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